| Woman: |
I'll have a tall decaf Blonde roast, please.
|
| Me: |
We don't have decaf Blonde roast ground or brewing right now. The only decaf we have is Pike's, which we can do as a pour-over.
|
| Woman: |
What?!
|
| Me: |
The only three coffees we're serving are regular Pike's, regular Blonde, and decaf Pike's.
|
| Woman: |
That doesn't make any sense. How can you not have decaf Blonde?
|
| Me: |
We're a kiosk. We only grind three coffees in the morning. Those are the only coffees we can brew all day. You can buy a bag of decaf Blonde if you-
|
| Woman: |
EXPLAIN YOURSELF.
|
| Me: |
Okay. We can't grind a whole bag for one person. We only grind three-
|
| Woman: |
THIS IS RIDICULOUS. I'M CALLING STARBUCKS HEADQUARTERS. WHATEVER. I'LL HAVE REGULAR DECAF. GET ME MY COFFEE.
|
| Me: |
That's fine, ma'am.
|
| I take several minutes to do a decaf pour-over, the most pain in the ass order ever, but whatever. She stands at the side making impatient noises the whole time and leaves without thanking me.
|
| Five minutes later, an even longer line, her friend comes up.
|
| Guy: |
What's this about you not having decaf Blonde roast?
|
| Me: |
We can only brew you a coffee if it's already ground.
|
| Guy: |
So you can't grind it if someone orders it?
|
| Me: |
We would have to take an entire one-pound bag of decaf Blonde, grind it, then make it as a pour-over. It's a twelve dollar bag of coffee made for one person for less than two dollars. That would be a tremendous waste of money.
|
| Guy: |
So this is about money?
|
| Me: |
Sir, I don't make the rules. We always only grind three-
|
| Guy: |
Starbucks always makes the coffee we want. I'm calling your headquarters. They're going to hear about this.
|
| Me: |
Well, I hope you have fun with that. NEXT ORDER, PLEASE.
|
| Anyone who orders a decaf blonde roast shouldn't be allowed in the building. That is inexcusable. |
